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At least you'll never be a vegetable

Even artichokes have hearts.

NEWS fanclub Newsletter #23
Here's a translation of the cross talk section of the latest FC newsletter that came out in early November.

NEWS Cross talk

The usual photo shoots came in handy when acting as a model.

S       Koyama started filming for ‘Juyo Sankonin Tantei’, right?
T       What kind of role is it?
M       Wow, Tegoshi’s leading [the conversation]. (laughing)
K       There’s the three of us, Tamamori, Furukawa Yuki-kun and me, and Tamamori is always the first person to discover some kind of incident. So, when it seems like he’ll become a suspect I try to figure out and resolve the situation. I’m a ‘mystery nerd’.
T       Tamamori..! We joined the agency at the same time. What’s it like on set?
K       At first he seemed cool, but once you actually talk to him, you realize that he has a mischievous and cute part to him. Tamamori’s blood type is B.
T       Ah, Same as me?
K       Yeah, since Tegoshi’s also B, I’m used to handling B’s. (laughing)
T       Hahaha, ‘handling’!
K       It doesn’t feel strange, or rather it’s easy to be around each other.
M       Koyama, you’re playing a model?
S       So, that means there’ll be scenes with you acting as a model? How is that?
K       What do you mean ‘how is that’?
S       How do you act like a model? Wasn’t it difficult?
K       The movements I usually do when doing photo shoots came in handy I think.
M      Try and walk like a model.
T        Try and walk from over there!
K       Ehh, Like this? (Koyama stands from his seat and from a short distance away walks back dashingly)
S       …The cameraman didn’t film it at all. (laughing)
M       They weren’t following Koyama at all. (laughing)
T        (Bursts out laughing)
M       …Well, it wasn’t preserved in a picture, (laughing) but he’s properly acting as a model, so everyone, please look forward to it.
K       ….Definitely. (laughing)
S       You’re filming early in the morning a lot right. What time are you waking up?
K       Usually around 5:30 am.
TSM   Ehhh!
K       But I’ve gotten pretty used to it.
M       You’re working hard.
T        You’re really working. (laughing)
K       Thanks. That’s all for me! (laughing)

I want to take proper care of my throat and make it through the play.

K       Next is Shige’s play, ‘Green Mile’. How is working with Baruto-san?
T        Eh, the Baruto-san that used to be a Sumo wrestler?
M       He’s appearing in the play?
S        Right right.
T        He’s from Estonia right.
S        You’re really knowledgeable. (laughing)
T        The play is running at the Globe Tokyo, right? There are performances outside of Tokyo too, right?
S        Yeah, 6 performances in Kyoto.
T        Nice nice. Can you relax some in Kyoto?
S        Seems unlikely. (laughing) I was looking forward to that too. But I’ve been wallowing in sadness since hearing that my schedule will be tight. (laughing)
M       This was originally made into a movie too, right? What country is it from?
S        America. And I’ll be playing a prison guard.
T        I see. …Shige, recently you’ve been acting a lot.
S        You say that, but then you’ve never been to see one of my plays. I’d like you to come soon.
T        I’ll go, I’ll go! I’m adjusting my schedule. I mean, I want to meet Baruto-san!
M       That’s your goal. (laughing)
S        His way of speaking is cute. (Does an impersonation)
TKM   Hahaha, cute!
K        Also, with a play, taking care of your health is important.
S        Yeah. This year especially, I’ve been having issues with my throat so I want to pay special attention and care to it.
T        Since it’s not good if you lose your voice. Well, I’ll bring a really spicy food as a refreshment ♪
K        Oh, good idea.
S        Hey!
M       I want to bring something other than food, how about a dehumidifier?
S        Hahaha, a dehumidifier not a humidifier? (laughing) Dehumidifying during an already dry time!
M       What’ll you do, Koyama? How about bringing a dry and crumbly snack?
T        Ah, good idea. Something that’ll completely dry up the mouth. (laughing)
S        You’re saying that, but I have faith that you’ll bring something nice. (laughing)

Message me with what souvenirs you want from overseas! (laughing)

S        And Massu’s ‘Netapare’. How is it, are there any comedians you like?
M       Hm, there’s a lot. (Massu lists comedian names one after the other)
K        It’s fun doing that program isn’t it? I laugh a lot just watching it on TV, so seeing it live must be even more fun.
M       Yeah, it’s interesting to see the comedians’ acts live, and getting to collaborate with them sometimes is fun too.
S        How do you feel doing it?  Do you get nervous?
M       I do. The atmosphere is amazing.
S        And it’s all so fast-paced, the speed of each joke.
K       It’s about one minute per joke.
S       But with collaborations you get to know the comedians don’t you?
M       Yeah. For example, recently I collaborated with ANZEN’s Miyazon-san and been able to get to know him.
T        Ah, speaking of, when I was filming for ‘Sekai no Hate made ItteQ!’, I was in the dressing room reading a TV magazine and by chance, there was a ‘Netapare’ article with a picture of Massu and Miyazon-san together. While I was looking at that I said ‘You appeared with our Masuda, didn’t you?’ and he replied “It appears so’. (laughing)
M       On set he always approaches me like it’s the first time. (laughing) But, having those kinds of exchanges is a unique experience to the program, and it’s good stimulous.
S       It’s also a good learning experience about comedy.
M       I see!
K       It’s true, Massu’s jokes haven’t been falling flat as much. (laughing) It feels like he’s become a specialist of the ‘pause’.  I was moved thinking that ‘That Massu has become this good at using the ‘pause’”.
M      What! I’ve never heard of a ‘pause’ specialist.
T       I don’t get it. He's definitely just randomly saying that. (laughing)
K       Huh, is that how it sounds?
S       Even if that’s true, it’d not something you want to hear. That “ He’s a ‘pause’ specialist’.” (laughing)
M       You, just making random comments! (laughing) Well, anyway I’m having fun doing the program. Last, is Tegoshi’s ’Soccer ★ Earth’.
T        I’ve been doing this program for 5 years already.
S        Certainly, and this year the number of broadcasts is increasing, right?
T        Yeah, it is! I’m happy.
K        Since it’s live there are a lot of times you’ve gone on air after concerts, it feels good, doesn’t it? (laughing)
S        I get that!
K        When I go home after a concert and turn on the TV to see Tegoshi working, it feels like the tiredness just goes away.
T        Why! (laughing) Certainly, [working] after a concert is physically tough I guess. At any rate, it’s like using up all my energy all at once. It’s tough to get pumped up all over again.
S       When I did live radio, it was the exact same situation, so I can really understand the difficulty. But, at that time   Tegoshi really teased me, so when I think that now, at last, I can get revenge it makes me happy. (laughing) When I think of it, I feel even better. (laughing)
M       Unlike you two, I don’t think it ‘feels good’ at all ♪
T        Thanks. (laughing) But, it’s a really fun program so I don’t feel tired at all. Since I love soccer and I basically get to talk freely about it.
K        It’s free talk, but it’s amazing because, in the end, it’s a properly done program.
M        What’s it like when you’re interviewing players? Are there things that you can’t ask?
T         Generally, no. But when you go to report on things overseas, it’s considered obvious for things to get delayed by about 2 hours after you’ve started reporting.  (laughing) In that sense, it’s difficult.
S        Oh really. Are you going to do overseas coverage again soon?
T        I don’t know yet, but I think I will.
K        I’m looking forward to the souvenirs!
T        I wonder what would be good. I’ll get the delicious kind of stuff for everyone that I always buy.
M       I’m fine with clothes.
T        Isn’t that dangerous? I mean, I’ll be the one picking the clothes? (laughing)
M       If it’s a large size then it’s fine. There are various kinds overseas right!
T        …Well, when it’s decided that I’ll be going abroad, everyone message me what you want before I leave! (laughing)
K       With that, this issue has been a report on everything going on with all the solo projects we’ve all been doing.